Tag Archives: sexual

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SEXUAL FANTASIES

Sexual fantasies are imaginary mental representations that stimulate and accompany sexual acts, as with dream interpretation, can give us access to knowledge of unconscious and repressed desires, in addition to representing our tastes in sexual matters.

Should we hide our fantasies? The fact that these remain in our subjective and unrealized world confer a degree of excitability but sharing them also provides an extra stimulus to sex with couple.

Having fantasies does not reflect a dissatisfaction in sexual relationships but rather they have mainly an aphrodisiac role, they are normal, exciting and completely natural. For clinical sexology the sexual fantasy is a necessary instrument for a satisfactory sexual life, without it, it is possible that a dysfunction of sexual desire is installed,  according to a study on sexology, the nature of fantasies varies among the population, but very few can be considered rare or unusual.

They are only considered pathological when they begin to take place and affect the life of the person or when they are the only way to achieve orgasm then they enter the field of paraphilias. Sexual fantasies are important to such an extent that the formation of the couple ideal that inspires us to fall in love and choose a partner is based on the sexual fantasies we build throughout life.

Its primary function is to intensify sexual pleasure by filling conscious desires and even unconscious ones providing stimuli for masturbation. Sexual fantasies are one of the richest fields of freedom and creativity in our human condition.

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AGGRESSIVENESS IN SEX

The aggressive drive is a response to the disturbance caused by different basic needs, there is a close relationship between the circuits of aggression and those of reproduction in the limbic brain, due to this concordance we might think that this would explain why some people experience pleasure with violence or have aggressive sexual behaviors.

Recent research shows that when the mechanism of reproduction is activated in the brain, you can´t trigger at the same time the aggressiveness, for this reason we can´t give a purely genetic interpretation of the existence of aggressive behavior in sex.

Experiences and education contribute to the structuring of emotions, in puritanical societies that stimulate constant seduction but deny satisfaction, generate sexual discharges that are much more aggressive and perverse. Also masochistic pornography where violence and sexual arousal come together can help a conditioned association between sexual arousal and violent responses.

We see that sexual aggressiveness is related to intrapsychic conflicts where the drive can’t be neutralized or channeled by more affectionate sexual expressions. Sex is part of our life from the moment we are born and in a first stage our libido is expressed through autoerotism evolving as we grow, we are sexed beings and our mental health will depend on how we have integrated our drives with our affections, only then we can express ourselves in a complete way.

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FRIGIDEZ: ESPECTADORAS DE NUESTRO GOCE

La ausencia de placer y deseo erótico genera mucha frustración e incomprensión en una sociocultura como la nuestra que mediatiza de manera muy significativa nuestra actitud hacia nuestra propia sexualidad. El trastorno del deseo sexual hipoactivo o frigidez es una inhibición general del deseo y la excitación sexual, a nivel psicológico no existen estímulos eróticos, a nivel físico no se produce lubricación , la vagina no se expande y no se provoca la plataforma orgásmica. El origen de este trastorno es multifactorial en la terapia analítica exploramos los primeros recuerdos sexuales infantiles y las atracciones instintivas adolescentes para poder descubrir como se configuraron nuestras primeras experiencias con el sexo y que impronta dejaron en nuestro psiquismo.

Para poder entender en profundidad este trastorno es fundamental que asimilemos que es una disfunción asociada a nuestro deseo, es a partir de aquí que debemos interpretar que falla en nuestra posición como deseantes.

Quizás aprendimos a anular nuestras propias sensaciones placenteras centrándonos exclusivamente en complacer el deseo del Otro donde nuestra educación nos modeló para permanecer en una energía siempre pasiva. El desconocimiento del funcionamiento de nuestro propio cuerpo y del orgasmo femenino puede frustrar las expectativas de goce y puede ser también una de las causas de este trastorno.

El orgasmo se produce por la contracción involuntaria de los músculos circunvaginales debido a la estimulación sensorial del clítoris que es crucial para la consecución del orgasmo, es importante que conozcamos el papel fundamental de este pequeño órgano sexual para la obtención del placer como mujeres. El estado mental en la relación sexual es fundamental ya que todas las funciones vegetativas de las que depende la excitación sexual femenina, como la vasocongestión vulvar, son sensibles a estados de tranquilidad y sosiego.

El placer que nunca llega produce estados depresivos y merma nuestra autoestima, esto nos lleva a un estado de negatividad que bloquea nuestro deseo y nuestras sensaciones sexuales, un bucle cerrado del que no sabemos como escapar. Debemos reubicarnos en nuestra posición de deseantes y permitirnos nuestro placer para poder abandonarnos libremente sin bloqueos a todo nuestro mundo sensorial.

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